ZeroVerge Personal

Don't overgeneralise, Mary Poppins!

Tue, 01 May 2012 22:50:16 +0800

Jinda: (singing) A spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down... medicine go down...
Me: But what if it's medicine for diabetes?
Jinda: zzz

lovequotesrus: Photo Courtesy: dejiprincess

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 08:57:55 +0800

lovequotesrus:

Photo Courtesy: dejiprincess

Almost done packing. Learning new things like how triple bagging...

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 21:33:11 +0800

Almost done packing. Learning new things like how triple bagging dried shrimps still can’t hide the smell completely (in Naraya bag).

This looks like my mom’s dream rice dumpling!

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 18:19:56 +0800

This looks like my mom’s dream rice dumpling!

Something special for my parents and in-laws!

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 16:03:31 +0800

Something special for my parents and in-laws!

lovequotesrus: Photo Courtesy: dejiprincess

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 16:02:01 +0800

lovequotesrus:

Photo Courtesy: dejiprincess

The last time I did this was almost 8 years ago. Almost burnt...

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 00:03:29 +0800

The last time I did this was almost 8 years ago. Almost burnt the whole envelope with the card in it! I got to play with fire more often…

Narti has a knack for making sinful treats!

Sun, 19 Feb 2012 19:18:13 +0800

Narti has a knack for making sinful treats!

Having a quick & light lunch!

Sat, 04 Feb 2012 13:48:40 +0800

Having a quick & light lunch!

Chilli crab kueh pieti… The ultimate in kueh pietis!

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 20:04:04 +0800

Chilli crab kueh pieti… The ultimate in kueh pietis!

Indulging on our honeymoon… Thai milk tea ice cream! Gosh!

Sat, 07 Jan 2012 17:48:54 +0800

Indulging on our honeymoon… Thai milk tea ice cream! Gosh!

Mmm, last day of 1-for-1 promotion!

Tue, 29 Nov 2011 19:48:24 +0800

Mmm, last day of 1-for-1 promotion!

Wei Quan and Rachel’s first dance!

Sat, 26 Nov 2011 23:18:12 +0800

Wei Quan and Rachel’s first dance!

I’m getting old, so I guess it’ll be early to bed...

Sat, 26 Nov 2011 20:18:53 +0800

I’m getting old, so I guess it’ll be early to bed for the 6th course.

Congratulations, my friend!

Sat, 26 Nov 2011 18:48:07 +0800

Congratulations, my friend!

A single rose in a overturned glass vase makes for a Beauty...

Sat, 26 Nov 2011 11:03:26 +0800

A single rose in a overturned glass vase makes for a Beauty & The Beast rose look-a-like. Recreating an old gift to my beloved.

The traditional proposal happened to be the same date as my...

Sat, 12 Nov 2011 13:03:35 +0800

The traditional proposal happened to be the same date as my actual proposal to Jinda 2 years ago!

Worrying

Mon, 24 Oct 2011 19:00:06 +0800

They say that worrying is a like a rocking chair: It gives you something to do, but gets you nowhere.

However, regardless of whether one knows how unproductive worrying is, one still does. I was doing just that a moment ago, until I got distracted with how to stop worrying. So here’s what I got so far.

A person worries when he or she is uncertain about an outcome and imagines as many outcomes as possible, but focuses on the negative. The more steps there are to the problem, the more exponential the possibilities are. So there are two parts, being uncertain and focusing on the negative.

About being uncertain

To reduce uncertainty, one needs more information. Without information, the tendency is to worry about the negative (next step). Why? People are generally defensive as a survival instinct. To focus on the negative allows a person to prepare for it.

Having more information allows for a more objective assessment of whether effort and energy should be put into preparing for the worst. Otherwise, even if the chance of a positive outcome is higher, the subjective focus on the negative blinds one into the next step of worrying.

The other thing to remember is, outcomes are infinite. The question is, are you worrying about the top few most likely or are you trying to be a supercomputer and trying to figure out the trillion and one ways things are going to go? Pick the most likely few (if you can’t count them with one hand, you know that that’s too many) and evaluate them.

About focusing on the negative

Focusing on the negative is not bad in itself. But it is bad ALONE. Once you properly assess that the chance of the worse or worst scenarios being a possibility, one needs to properly act accordingly. So it’s good to remember the following:

If a problem has a solution, apply it.
If a problem has no solution, there is nothing you can do about it anyway.

If there is no solution, well, let’s say that worrying has no use. The outcome is beyond one’s control and one should accept it. But if it hasn’t happened, there is no benefit to assume it will.

Not all solutions are desirable, but it is better than the problem (if it’s not, then it’s not a solution). Those are solutions only because we can act on them, and when facing it, we should. But until we face the problem, we cannot apply the solution.

Of course, we can apply the concepts of insurance and hedging to mitigate the risks or even reduce the probability of the worst possible outcome by taking steps. However, like solutions, action must be taken.

Once you know what you should do, you can stop worrying.

Conclusion: Evaluate, prepare and act/react. Anything else is a distraction.

What are the most likely outcomes without intervention (up to five)?
Weigh the likelihood of positive and negative outcomes. Realise it may not be all that bad.
Eliminate the negative outcomes that are you cannot control or solve.
Of the remaining negative outcomes, prepare against them or to mitigate in proportion to their likelihood. If it’s very unlikely, put minimal effort into it.
Let time unfold the sequence of events. At each step, when you face an outcome undesirable, apply the solution accordingly or face the inevitable if it cannot be solved, then repeat if the process is not complete.

My Sister’s housewarming. Time to load up!

Sat, 22 Oct 2011 18:33:34 +0800

My Sister’s housewarming. Time to load up!

Back at the place of proposal!

Sun, 02 Oct 2011 17:18:31 +0800

Back at the place of proposal!